I'm a Yoga Teacher now (almost). So What?

Hello, and welcome to my rant about yoga culture in the United States and why I finally decided to become a certified teacher. This blog post is minimally edited on purpose. I am confused about yoga teachers' role in society, and I have mixed feelings about adding my name to that pot. So Buckle up and enjoy the tirade.

I did it. I finally enrolled in a Yoga Teacher Training course. Soon, I, too, will be another 200-hour certified yoga teacher ommmm-ing through zoom and posting inspirational quotes on Instagram.

I've been shoving my body into shapes without a certificate for years, but it never felt authentic. It didn’t feel true to my essence. I need this certificate to legitimize my yoga experience. Until now, I have been a well-researched fraud. I have been a body consumed by inauthentic asanas. Finally, my yoga practice, research, and the benefits I receive from yoga will be validated. I can evolve and count myself as one of the enlightened beings destined to walk this earth in pursuit of the perfect pair of yoga pants.

Okay, I kid. Maybe I went too far. I love yoga. I’ve practiced yoga for over 15 years in all shapes and sizes, and I derive enormous benefits from the practice. I am incredibly excited to take my education and understanding to the next level. Still, I am also aware and somewhat annoyed by the notion that anyone who wants to pay can just become a certified teacher. Where is the lifelong commitment? Where are the pre-requisites? Shouldn’t there be an audition process? Is this just a money-grabbing scheme by yoga teachers and studios? What, you thought it was cool for 6-months, so you took a course online or went to some exotic yoga retreat halfway around the world and became a teacher? Nobody thought to say, “hmmm, that’s great. Why don’t you study a little harder and take this placement exam first?”

In the classical music world, you would never pick up a violin and think, "wow, this is cool!" and then enroll in a violin teacher training program a few months later. This is the antithesis of what we learn in music school. And the honest truth is, I kind of agree, and I'm not sure I'd want to go to that class. But this seems to happen in yoga teacher training, and it really frustrates me…along with a few other things.

The honest truth is that I’m not interested in swilling beer while I flow. I don’t want to go to your booty-sculpt class. I don't prioritize the calorie burn of my yoga practice, and I vet yoga teacher knowledge and experience before I show up for class. I read bios, and if possible, check websites… and to be clear, I bet that if snotty me read my own soon to be yoga-bio, I probably wouldn't go to my own classes either.

I want a yoga teacher, and I want to BE a yoga teacher whose practice has evolved and stood the test of time.

You know why? Because the general public trusts yoga teachers too much.  

• We trust them to know everything about how the body works.

• We trust them with our physical pain,

• WE trust them with flexibility issues.

• We trust them with spiritual guidance.

• We trust them with nutritional advice.

• We trust their product and service recommendations.

• We trust their views on lifestyle choices.  

…and so much more.

I know this because I have done this and still do it to this day. I’m just a little more discerning about whose advice I want and am willing to listen to. So when I look for a yoga teacher, I want someone who has LIVED his or her advice and worn it for years before espousing it as tried and true. I don't want help with pelvic stability from someone who goes hard on a Friday night (no offense) and checks their phone while teaching class – yes, I've been to that class. Just because you can nail a handstand does not mean I want your input on politics. I don't want a hands-on adjustment from a teacher who can't explain what they are "assisting with." I certainly don't want you to tell me that to improve my energy levels, I should join you on a juice cleanse...because most likely, you are just starving.

As a yoga student, I have experienced all of these things. I have listened to these voices in my community and viewed them as leaders in the wellness world and then drove myself crazy, trying to follow their advice. It can be like fitting into a dress 3 sizes too small. No matter what, it’s not going to be pretty and definitely not comfortable.

With our idealized body shapes, beauty standards, flexibility paradigms, and obsession with wellness fads and trends, our society has done a disservice to the general public by lionizing and augmenting yoga teachers' social currency—especially young yoga teachers. I mean no disrespect to these teachers, but I pray to effing god or the Buddha or whatever the coolest trendiest spiritual being out there is that I do not become this. I do not want this, I don't want the students who want this, and I am not interested in perpetuating this culture. It is unhealthy and toxic and benefits nobody except the athletic wear companies.

I have changed. The world has changed. Things that were easy in my early 20s are more challenging now. I am not interested in going to a hanumanasana workshop with a yoga teacher who used to be a competitive gymnast. I can’t relate, and never could, to their physical experience, and chances are they can’t relate to mine either.

At this point, you may be thinking, "Wow, Hannah, is there anything you DO like about yoga? You really seem to dislike quite a bit about it."

Why did I do this training if I scoff and laugh and roll my eyes, and go on a tirade about yoga teachers? Why bother?

Well, many reasons.

I recognize that yoga is not a cure for everything, and yoga teachers are not doctors. I know that yogis are attracted to different aspects of the practice. Yoga has so many benefits, but it cannot cure ALL that ails. However, it offers many benefits, and those benefits outweigh the negative qualities that I have (not so) eloquently highlighted above that exist in association with the practice. Here are some of the reasons why I am proud, excited, and honored to be on my way towards the title of Yoga Teacher.

• I wrote my dissertation about it (you can download a copy here), specifically about Iyengar Yoga and violin playing. Ideally, I would love to be an Iyengar teacher, and one day I will (bucket list). However, this process is long and intensive – as it should be – and very tricky to fit around the fiddlings of a freelance musician. While I derive many benefits from other yoga styles, Iyengar Yoga brings me peace and calm, I find nowhere else.

• I have wanted to get certified as a teacher for over 5 years.

•  There is always more to learn.

• I love yoga. I derive enormous mental and physical benefits from daily practice. I want more people to have this experience, and if I can, I want to help them find it.

• Yoga is an excellent tool to investigate the self. I want to further my own exploration, and also be able to facilitate a small part of that for others.

•  I want to feel more confident in sharing my knowledge with others. Similarly, I want my students to feel comfortable with my credentials as a teacher.

• Now that I am halfway through this training, I realize how much I still didn't know about yoga – the traditions, philosophy, origins, etc. I am appreciating that by deepening my own awareness and education, I can help others more fully.

•  I love teaching and educating. I love facilitating growth and creating a safe, comfortable, and enjoyable place for people to come together.

• Sharing what I love with people who want to learn about it is one of the simple pleasures of my life. Whether we are talking about tea, violin music, yoga, fiction, or anything else, the fact that people WANT to do that with me is a great joy. 

• I see music-making as a full-body experience. One that can be enhanced by many lessons learned on the mat. I see yoga as a full senses experience that takes the practitioner on a journey of self-inquiry and discovery. I love that process. It is beautiful, and ideally, music should also cultivate some of this. This is the “fringe” I want to explore most deeply.

• What I love most about yoga, is that you practice it entirely for yourself. There is no enlightenment competition. There is no stage where you have to show up and perform. There is nothing but continually returning to a state of oneness, whatever that means for you. Chasing this elusive Unity and ease is what keeps many of us returning to our trusted yoga teachers and yoga mats. 

• Nobody makes you go to yoga class. You are there for yourself. That matters. The intent of your presence is meaningful.

• I have met some of the most special people in my life through yoga. It can create the most magical community.

 I am coming to terms with that; ultimately, any training is precisely what you make of it. The more you put in, the more you get out. At the end of this training, I may have the same yoga credential as someone who has been practicing for less time or someone who has more yoga ability (whatever that means). Still, I know that my experience guides my education and outcomes and will take me to a whole different level of personal accomplishment and satisfaction. I’m not saying I think I’m a kick-ass teacher. I’m merely saying that in some ways, I do consider this a calling. I don’t want to tell you what is right and wrong in your life. I don’t want to sell you diet pills or protein powder. I know and own that this training does not qualify me to advise on a whole spectrum of loosely related topics. I just want to geek out about stuff that I find really useful, awesome, and beneficial in the hopes that you will derive benefits from it as well. Hopefully, this will ultimately inspire you to hang out with me more often. By doing so, we can cultivate a little community that fosters personal growth and authenticity. A place that we can return to and find solace and comfort in and use to fuel our lives and find peace and contentment.

Is that too much to ask?

I'll be blogging more regularly about movement and yoga, so stay tuned for more musings on the topic coming to you for the rest of my blogging days.

Routines and Rituals for Optimal Living that Actually Work!

I love routines and structure in my day. I keep a monthly, weekly, and daily schedule of things I hope to and plan to accomplish. I EVENTUALLY complete about 95% of what I plan to do each week and month...just maybe on a slightly different timeline.

I also love the concept and notion of hacking my days with optimal routines. I see things all the time with titles like “5 simple morning moves to get you going” or “the ideal bedtime routine for your best night of sleep” or "buy these products for the softest skin of your life," and I think I WANT THAT! I Want the Best Morning! I want the best sleep! I want the best skin! And then I do these things for a few days or a week, or whatever. Then I'm back to my old habits prioritizing coffee in the morning, forgetting my nighttime face mask, and watching Netflix until too late at night.

When COVID-19 hit, I started experimenting with a few routine changes, additions, and enhancements that resemble slight tweaks to my daily routines rather than a massive overhaul. Below are the upgrades I’ve managed to maintain in my daily routine over the last few months, mostly because they are simple, easy, and effective.

So here are my new habits. Nothing fancy. No new products to buy. I’ve broken them into 2 categories – General Well-being, and Musical Well-Being. They are simple and effective. I’m sharing them with you because who doesn’t need more things to add to their daily routines? LOL

Rituals for a Smooth Daily Existence

•  Drink 1 glass of water before bed

• Drink 1 glass of water first thing in the morning

• Read for 15-30 mins (preferably a real book, not a screen) before sleep.

• Overnight, plug your phone in on the other side of the room (or a separate room altogether).

• Rub each foot, ankle, lower leg every night for 1-2 minutes before going to bed - ideally slowly and unhurried.

• Write down the daily TO DO list the night before and plan WHEN you will do each item. This makes me less inclined to put things off until the evening.

• 20-30 mins of light-moderately strenuous in the morning (preferably yoga or a walk around the neighborhood followed by 5-10 minutes of meditation/quiet time.

• Go on at least one long walk (60+ minutes) per week.

• Avoid coffee after lunch.

• A cup or two of herbal tea in the Evening
  

Routines for Optimized practice time

• Get at least some, if not all, of my practicing done before lunch.

• Foot rub

• Timani Warm-Ups (more on this soon, but check out my original Timani blog here)

• 25-45 minutes of Violin Technique warm-ups AFTER Timani routine.*

• Put the phone on airplane mode during practice time.

• Use Pomodoro Method to organize practice times and breaks (I wrote about this for corpSonore, you can read it here)

• Plan my practice per week – select technical exercises, repertoire, long term, and short term goals at the beginning of the week and write them down.

*If you’re thinking, “what the hell is this Timani stuff she’s talking about?” don’t worry! I just completed the level 1 teacher training course, and I would be happy to tell you all about it. You can now read the blog post I wrote about it last year when I first discovered it and fell in love with the Technique. I’ll be sharing more soon.

My Ideal Day

This is the day my Wellness Dreams are made of. These days don't happen often, but I feel like I’m living my best life when they do.

• Wake up early

• 20-30 mins of yoga in the morning

• Violin Practice for 2-3 hours

• 3 delicious meals

• Moderate to Long Hike in the Afternoon or Evening (or Morning).

• Time to journal and reflect.

• Read a Good Book

• Hot Tea in the Evening

• A Warm Bath before bedtime.

What rituals and routines work for you?

The Violin Music of East Germany Part IV: Hanns Eisler.

This month the spotlight is on Hanns Eisler, arguably the most famous East German composer. Eisler had an equally fraught and illustrious career. No other composer from my project seems to have combined politics and music so completely, which caused both trials and tribulations in his musical career. Musicologist David Blake notes that ‘no composer suffered more from the post-1945 cultural cold war,’ than Eisler. However, in recent years his work has been celebrated.

He is best known for composing the national anthem of East Germany, for his long artistic association with Bertolt Brecht, his film scores, and the book he co-wrote with Adorno. Plus, The Hochschule für Musik "Hanns Eisler" is named after him. Not bad. 

His violin music was the easiest to find, although admittedly, he didn't write much for violins and strings. Now that I own it, I’ve quickly learned that it is not easy to play. His music is difficult and challenging and sits awkwardly on the violin. I blame his teacher, Schoenberg, but no doubt there is more to it. 

Read on to learn more.

About Eisler

Eisler was born in Leipzig, July 6, 1898 (happy belated birthday!), but grew up in Vienna, where his father, an Austrian Jew, worked as an editor and translator. Both of his parents were amateur musicians, and from an early age, Eisler immersed himself in music. 

During WWI, He served as a soldier on the front-lines in the Austro-Hungarian army and was wounded several times during combat. After his discharge from the military in 1918, Eisler studied composition with Karl Weigl at the New Vienna Conservatory and supported himself with proofreading work at the Universal Editions publishing house. During his first few months as a civilian, Eisler composed prolifically. From 1919-1923 He was a pupil of Arnold Schoenberg and was the first of Schoenberg's disciples to compose in the twelve-tone or serial technique. His music from the early 1920s very much shows the influence of his mentor. 

In 1925 Eisler accepted a teaching position at the Klindworth-Scharwenka Conservatory in Berlin and in 1926 he applied for membership in the German Communist Party but was denied membership mostly because he failed to pay his dues on time. In 1926 he started writing articles on music for the Communist periodical Die Rote Fahne. He also created anthems, marching songs, and pieces for unaccompanied men's chorus that were not just overtly supportive of the proletariat in their texts but also self-consciously 'accessible' in their musical content. (all of this was recorded in FBI files – more on that later).

A disagreement in musical and political values led to a break with his esteemed teacher, Schoenberg, who moved to Berlin in January 1926 to teach at the Prussian Academy of Arts. Schoenberg accused Eisler of being disloyal, and Eisler, in turn, accused, Schoenberg of being bourgeois. 

Eisler was in Vienna in January 1933 when Hitler became German Chancellor. Those involved with the German Workers' movement were forced to cease their activities immediately, and Eisler decided not to return to Berlin. The Nazi Party subsequently banned his music. During the early 1930s, Eisler moved around Europe and traveled to and from New York regularly, where he spoke publicly against Fascism in Germany. In 1937 Eisler accepted a teaching position at the New School for Social Research in New York in the hopes of moving to the United States permanently.

In 1942 Eisler moved from New York to Hollywood to teach at USC and write music for films. He continued his collaborations with Brecht while living in California, and in 1947 co-wrote Composing for the Films with Theodore Adorno. His reputation and contacts enabled a fruitful career as a Hollywood composer, and he was nominated for an Academy Award in 1942 for the score for Hangmen also Die (1942), which depicts the assassination of Reinhard Heydrich, Reichsprotektor in charge of Czechoslovakia and the Czech people’s resistance to Nazi occupation. Eisler was one of the first Hollywood composers to use atonality and tone rows in film music.

Eisler's promising career in the U.S. was interrupted by the Cold War. He was one of the first artists placed on the Hollywood blacklist by the film studio bosses. In two interrogations by the House Committee on Un-American Activities, the composer was accused of being "the Karl Marx of music" and the chief Soviet agent in Hollywood. His supporters, including his friend Charlie Chaplin and the composers Igor Stravinsky, Aaron Copland, and Leonard Bernstein, organized benefit concerts to raise money for his defense fund, but he was deported in early 1948. Folksinger Woody Guthrie protested the composer's deportation in his lyrics for "Eisler on the Go"—recorded fifty years later by Billy Bragg and Wilco on the Mermaid Avenue album (1998). 

Eisler on the Go

Words by Woody Guthrie, Music by Billy Bragg

Eisler on the go, 
Eisler on the move 
Brother is on the Vinegar truck and 
I don't know what I'll do 

I don't know what I'll do, 
I don't know what I'll do 
Eisler's on the come and go and
I don't know what I'll do

Eisler on the farm,
Eisler on the town 
Sister in the tickly bush and 
I don't know what I'll do

Eisler on the boat, 
Eisler on the ship 
Daddy on the henhouse roof and 
I don't know what I'll do

Eisler in the jailoe, 
Eisler back at home, 
Ranking scratch his head and cry and 
I don't know what I'll do

Eisler him write music, 
Eisler him teach school, 
Truman him don't play so good and 
I don't know what I'll do

On March 26, 1948, Eisler and his wife departed the United States and returned to Germany, where they settled in East Berlin, attracted by its promise of a socialist society. Before leaving, he read the following statement:

I leave this country, not without bitterness and infuriation. I could well understand it when in 1933, the Hitler bandits put a price on my head and drove me out. They were the evil of the period; I was proud of being driven out. But I feel heartbroken over being driven out of this beautiful country in this ridiculous way.

Upon his arrival in East Germany, one of his first compositional activities was setting Johannes Becher's poem "Auferstanden aus Ruinen," (Risen from Ruins) to music, which became the national anthem for the newly established German Democratic Republic. He was then elected to the German Academy of Arts and served as an esteemed professor of composition at the Hochschule für Musik for twelve years.  

 Eisler died of a heart attack (his second) in East Berlin in September 1962 and. His grave is near Brecht's in the Dorotheenstadt cemetery.

Eisler (left) pictured here with good friend and collaborator Bertolt Brecht.

His Legacy

After his death, the Hochschule für Musik was renamed the Eisler Conservatory in his honor, and in 1994 the reunified Germany officially supported both the founding of an International Hanns Eisler Society and the launch of a critical edition of Eisler's collected works.

The Hanns Eisler Music Conservatory in Berlin.

On January 25, 2009, Leon Botstein at Bard College conducted a concert at New York's Avery Fisher Hall, titled "Music of the Other Germany," which included the music of Eisler, Dessau, Wagner-Regeny, Zimmermann, and Matthus.

Eisler’s Violin Music 

Prelude and Fugue on B–A–C–H (string trio) (1934) acquired

Sonate für Violine und Klavier "Die Reisesonate" (1937) acquired

Duo Op.7 for Violin and Cello acquired

Sources:

http://orelfoundation.org/composers/article/hanns_eisler

http://holocaustmusic.ort.org/resistance-and-exile/hanns-eisler/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanns_Eisler

• private communications with friends of the Wende Museum.